Wednesday, April 17, 2013

M.I.A.

So I've been MIA for a while, cause I had finals to study for and gardening to do and I was trying to teach myself crochet and I have to deal with my new puppy...but honestly the reason I've been missing is because I got tired of always posting my failures and not being able to do my best at anything. But lately I've been actually eating less than normal. Yesterday I got groceries so now instead of eating shitty food I can eat veggies and salad!
In other news, do you guys believe in aliens? I do. Hands down. I used to think I was abducted by one when I was little but I doubt it. My future hobby is gonna be one of those alien investigator people. I probably sound crazy but whatever I find it fascinating.
I'm getting breakouts because of the change in weather. I swear this weather is freaking bipolar. One day its 80 and the next it's 58. I can't even walk my puppy cause its too cold for him. I started working out again though. Imma start slowly at first. I'm exhausted so Imma go to sleep even though it's the middle of the afternoon.

~xoxo anamia~

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

The binge cycle

I hate this fucking disorder. Overeating is considered bulimia too, even if you don't b/p. I just finished binging. I ate an activia yogurt, a chocolate pudding, some chabatta bread (however the hell you spell it,) some sourdough bread, some cheese crackers with cheddar cheese, a brownie, and a cup of Pepsi. So I'm a fat fucking failure and I really wish I could starve all my body fat away. I really want to just go as long as I can without eating but I have no self control or willpower and honestly it makes me want to cry. I've been doing my leg exercises so at least I'm doing something besides sitting on my ass. I've been watching vampire diaries and nina dobrev is my new thinspiration. I need help. I feel so hopeless. I need to not be hungry anymore. I wish I never got hungry.

Frustrated & Sad
~xoxo anamia~

Saturday, April 6, 2013

New plan

I feel defeated whenever I post on this blog because I feel like I'm letting you guys down. I've been eating unhealthy foods but today Imma restrict and try to shrink my stomach again. Hardcore dieting starting now. I need hope and willpower and motivation. I need strength.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Plans for tomorrow

Starting tomorrow I'm gonna do a tea, water and coffee fast. I'm going to keep going until my self control goes out the window. I can do this, I know I can. I'm tired of eating like normal people. It makes me feel bloated and fat. I just need to reach my goal, that will motivate me.

Unfortunately struggling,

~xoxo anamia~

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Days like today

Today I've only had popcorn, peanuts and hot cheetos along with some juice and sprite. Around 500 cals maybe. I'm not even hungry. Why can't everyday be like today minus the junk food? Hopefully I've lost in the morning. My sleeping schedule is so shot, my puppy woke me up at 5 this morning after keeping me up till 2. I'll post my weight in the morning.