Sunday, June 30, 2013

Don't even get me started

Yesterday did not go at all like I planned. My parents decided to buy me a veggie burger special again yesterday and its not like I could say no after they already bought it and I would feel horrible if I threw it away because money is really tight in my house right now. I ended up cutting the burger in half and eating half the burger with the fries totaling to about 600 cals. I figured that would be it for the day, but as I've realized in the past, I can't eat all my calories in one meal for the day because It usually leads to overeating. obviously later I got hungry again so I ate the rest of the burger and if that wasn't bad enough I also ate a fucking banana before I went to bed. TO MAKE IT WORSE, my ankles were acting up all day yesterday and i didn't want to push it by exercising on top of the pain so I didn't. Honestly I could have made it work by going bike riding or something but I think it was just one of those bad days where you don't want to do anything, plus it was mother fucking 85 degrees at 9pm which is my usual exercise time. I don't want to end up passing out and hurting something and then not being able to exercise for several weeks, ya know? So that's me trying to rationalize it so that I don't feel bad (even though I do) 
Despite my laziness I woke up at 176.6 which means I gained two ounces but whatever I'll lose it when I exercise tonight. I would recommend that you guys try the ACV thing, because even if it doesn't work for you there's really no bad things about it. Just remember to dilute 2 tbsp in 1 cup water. I drink it with a straw while plugging my nose then I rinse my mouth out. It's actually kind of funny to watch me do it lol 
I'll post my intake for yesterday  

Saturday, June 29, 2013


This morning I woke up at 176.2..... Yesterday I was 176.4.... Uhm I overate yesterday so shouldnt I be fatter? I don't get it. Maybe its because I did the ACV thing twice yesterday and I usually only do it once a day. I don't know but I'm grateful either way. I'm soooo close to the 160's!! I need that so bad. I'm almost at my first GW (:
So far I haven't eaten anything, I've only had 4 cups of water. So I'll update more later today with my intake and stuff.

Friday, June 28, 2013

Pinterest & my fat ass

Today is an awful day so far, I haven't exercised yet and I overate today. I had like 1700-1800 calories. I'm so ashamed. My dad bought me a veggie burger special from ricks burgers this morning and the combo totaled to about 900 calories or so. That was bad enough so I decided not to eat anything else today but that was unsuccessful, obviously. Then I got hungry around 7pm and ate a freaking peanut butter sandwich and some garlic naan (it's like some Indian tortilla or something) and now I feel like fermented shit. I'm gonna go exercise at 9:30, run a mile then do some jump rope. I downloaded blogger, my fitness pal, and run keeper on my Itouch so now I can post snap shots of my progress and food diary and stuff so hopefully that will keep me on the right path. Except for today, today was a cluster fuck. 
I'm starting to look up thinspo on Pinterest, which is some website that's kinda like a mix of tumblr and Instagram IMO. I'm going to post a snapshot of my Pinterest thing and my food diary for today and later I'll update this post with my exercise.

Exercise follow up

So I didn't burn off as much as I wanted to but its better than nothing. Tomorrow is definitely gonna be a 500 cal day. I feel so fat right now. It's like every time I start to succeed, I do something to screw it up. I can't deal with this, I need to sleep on it. 

P.s. I didn't really go to in and out or Burger King, I couldn't find ricks burgers in the search menu so I just estimated the meal calories and picked the one I thought was closest. 

~xoxo anamia~

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Breaking down the plateau!

Guess who weighs 176.4?!? I do! I know its not a number to be proud of but its way better than 180. Yesterday I walked 3 miles with ankle weights and burned 300 calories and I only ate 600-700 calories all day. I've been restricting the past couple days and its been extremely hot so I've had headaches and been light headed. I've lost a total of 7 inches so far (all over my body) I even lost 3 inches around my back!!! Which is great because I hate the back fat I have. I recently started drinking Apple cider vinegar because I read that megan fox uses it to cut water weight and burn fat. It's supposed to increase your metabolism and target the fat that's stored in your body and burn it for energy. I put two tablespoons in a cup of water and gulp it down with a straw while holding my nose, then I rinse out my mouth with plain water because the acid in ACV isn't good for your tooth enamel or skin, which is why you're supposed to dilute it. I'm hoping it will work. It seems like it is because I don't really feel hungry, I drink the solution and eat a little snack after because I don't want the acid to burn a hole in my stomach or something. Hopefully I'm 175 tomorrow! Wish me luck (:

~xoxo anamia~

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Good exercise day (:

I over ate today, meaning I ate 1200 calories. 1200 is normal for most people but for me it is unacceptable, so to make up for it I ran a mile then walked 3.80 miles and burned a total of 502 calories. I also hurt my ankle because my street is uneven all over the place but tomorrow is my rest day so I'll have some time to rest up my muscles. I think today was okay in terms of trying to lose weight but tomorrow will have to be better. I'm back to 179 as of this morning so I'm hoping for 178 tomorrow. Time for some sleep.

~xoxo anamia~

Saturday, June 22, 2013

Willpower is everything!

Yesterday, I had a crack in willpower and ate so much crap. My dad bought mini donuts and one of those little chocolate cupcakes with the white squiggles on top and I couldn't help myself. You guys know how it is, one little break in the diet and self control goes out the window, so after I ate that, I also ate rice-a-roni and chips and a whole bunch of other shit and gained like 2 pounds by the morning. I tried to save it by power walking 2.8 miles but obviously it didn't work. Today was somewhat better food wise and I ran a mile, because I didn't run yesterday it was harder to run my mile today which sucked. I think tomorrow's gonna be a 500 cal day, I need to shrink my stomach again. I'm very disappointed with myself.

~xoxo anamia~

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Running is my thing

So lately I've gotten into running and it feels amazing! I've always had a love/hate relationship with it and I've told you guys this already but now I'm going out and running everyday and guess what?! I'm at 177! Which is great cause for the past couple weeks I've been stuck in the 180's even going as high as 186 like a week ago D: so I've been running a mile everyday, except yesterday I ran two miles (: today I'm limiting my calories to 500 because yesterday I went up to 1400 D: I didn't even have that much to eat yesterday, my family and I went to a restaurant and I got the veggie burger that comes with fries and some strawberry and rhubarb cobbler (it's my vice) so it sky rocketed up to 1400. Even though I ran yesterday I only burned off 232 calories but since I ate the meal around 1 in the afternoon my body burned off the calories by the time I went to bed and I woke up 2 pounds lighter (: so far I've had 447 calories so I'm really squeezing it in there but tonight I'm going to run another mile so hopefully I'll lose more weight tomorrow. My impossible goal is to lose 40 pounds by mid/end of July, so far I've lost like 7 pounds because I made the goal when I was at 185. Two days ago I only ate 700-800 calories and then I had a net calorie intake of 565 after my run and I lost some weight so I hope hope hope I can make my goals. I need that bikini body this summer!
My parents gave me a budget of $50-60 for two weeks of food, which in this economy is not a lot of money, so I bought healthy food (hardly any junk) and I spent like all $60. I've been reading the diets of the victoria secret models because they are my ultra idols/thinspo and miranda kerr (my role model) said that she likes to eat chia seeds to help her feel full. So I looked them up and they are expensive as hell but they do have a lot of fiber and protein and even omega-3's, so when I went shopping I picked some up (a small bag for $4.99! D: ) and I've been eating them everyday for breakfast, in my yogurt or cottage cheese, in juice or water or fruit smoothies, and they don't taste like anything so they adapt to whatever they're in which is really nice. They make me feel full longer, because of the fiber, and they seem to give me more energy during the day which is keeping my metabolism moving. Other than chia seeds, I bought some grapes and strawberries, almond milk, fruit juice, spinach, frozen vegetarian chicken, veggie eggrolls, healthy chips, low fat granola, non fat cottage cheese, non fat yogurt in raspberry and vanilla, pasta noodles and spaghetti sauce. All in all it's mostly healthy stuff ( I bought my groceries just in case of binges, this way I don't binge on junk.)
Hopefully tomorrow will be 175! I might run two miles today but I don't want to chance it because the last thing I need right now is to get hurt and be out of commission. I'll update more tomorrow (: Wish me luck!

p.s. one thing that keeps me motivated is that I took before pictures and I look so ugly in them that I keep repeating in my head "do it for the after picture" because that's one of the things I'm most looking forward too.

p.p.s. I'm adding a couple pictures of what I eat in a day and how I look after I workout lol. If you're not sweating after a workout, you're doing it wrong!

Thursday, June 13, 2013

the beginning of the thigh gap

so lately for exercise my main focus has been on my thighs (i.e. lunges, squats, leg lifts, etc) and I noticed that  I have a little gap forming between my inner thighs that wasn't there before! (: this obviously made me so so so happy because I am one step closer to my goals. I remeasured my thighs and I lost a total of 6 inches around them! How awesome is that?! I love looking in the mirror and seeing progress, it's such a motivator.
Well my house does not have any edible food in it right now (none that I can eat anyway) so I'm gonna do a fast today. Not only to lose weight but also to cleanse my body of all the nasty stuff I've eaten this past week. Honestly on my trip I ate take out like every day cause that's all we could do. It's not like they had a stove in our motel room or something. But surprisingly I only gained 2 pounds. Did I tell you guys that I got running shoes? Like actual running shoes. I'm so excited. I got them before my trip and they are so light when I run! Running is like one of my favorite things to do but I've always been too fat and lazy to actually do it. I was previously running in my converse which have absolutely no support whatsoever so my ankles would hurt the next day, but with these running shoes (they're new balance) my feet feel like air so I don't have to worry about my ankles anymore :D
I try to run 20 minutes a day, if I can. Well actually it's more like run one minute, walk one minute, run one minute, etc. but it is still wayyy better than if I would just sit on the couch like a potato and wait for my fat to melt itself away haha. I'm still doing other exercises too though. I am in love with all the victoria secret girls so I look up their diets and exercise routines and I incorporate that into my life as well. So I do a lot of pilates exercises and resistance band exercises along with the cardio. It actually feels good after you do it for a couple of days. The first two days you sweat like crazy and your body burns and you want to stop but if you keep going then you're one step closer to your GW, so that's what I do. I think my favorite exercise would be the side leg lifts. At first I had trouble doing 15 but now I can get through 50 without breaking a sweat (okay maybe a little) it's also really good if you don't like people watching you while you exercise. I hate it when people watch me so I just do all these exercises in my room and I run in the evenings when no one is outside. Honestly I'm tired of making excuses for not exercising, that is no way to lose weight and you're only failing yourself anyway. It's better to just work hardcore now and lose all the fat so then later you won't have to work as hard. Anyway that's just my two cents. I'll post more tomorrow :D

~xoxo anamia~

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I'm back :D

Ohmygod. I went to oakdale and I met josh in real life. At first I was awkward as shit cause I let my insecurities get in the way but then I thought to myself "you need to calm the fuck down" so I did and we had such an amazing connection!!! Literally you could feel sparks between us. It was awesome. We were perfect together. We're the perfect height for each other and we have the same sense of humor and we almost have the same eye color and we get along like we've known each other our whole lives and yes we have excellent sexual chemistry. He doesn't make me feel insecure at all. We cuddled and have sex the last two days and it was so sweet and romantic and I love him. I met his friends and we went on dates and it only lasted 4 days But it was the best time of my life. Honestly. We were just so perfect. Like you know how when a couple walks by or something you can sometimes feel or see how they're meant to be? That was exactly like us. Even his grandparents could tell that we were serious about each other right away. Everyone noticed. He made me so happy honestly. He's way different than my ex. He's way better. He said I was absolutely beautiful and that the first time he saw me his first thought was "wow she's so beautiful" and that made my spine tingle lol he never made me feel bad about myself or anything. It was kinda like love at first sight. Kissing him feels so right. I'm gonna visit him again soon. I miss him so much. We've been kinda dating for 8 months and we met finally and Ahhhh it was perfect. It felt like a fairy tale. He's so sweet and nice. We made each other laugh so much too which is super important. Now I'm even more motivated to lose weight!! Must look stunning for next time!!!

This is a photo of us together C:

Sunday, June 2, 2013

3 day fast?!

So in 3 days I will be driving 5/6 hours to meet the guy that I could potentially have a future with. So to look perfect(ish) for the big day, I'm going to do a 3 day fast. This is gonna be hard but I will do it because I love his personality so far and I want to lose as much weight as possible before then so that I could be attractive to him too. I can't keep making excuses. I exercise an hour a day everyday  and I haven't lost anything!! I don't know if its cause of my period or because I'm just made to be fat. Those feel like excuses. 3 day fast here I come!!